I recently had an encounter with a friend and she told me about her vacation. While she was telling me the story, I felt a stab in my stomach. What the heck was that? Was that jealousy taking a shot at me? She’s a good friend and I want to see her happy and yet I got this feeling seemingly out of nowhere. Wait, check it. Yes, it’s jealousy. What’s up with that feeling? And more importantly, why? I’m not in high school, I’m so past this, aren’t I?
When we get these feelings of jealousy, we need to ask ourselves, what’s really going on here. What am I jealous of? That I wanted a vacation and felt like I couldn’t have one? I didn’t deserve one? Couldn’t afford one? In my case it was all of these things. I discovered a program deep within the cells of my being where I believed that I didn’t’ deserve a vacation, or more specifically, time off to relax and be OK with being provided for.
I realized I have a hard time doing nothing and just being, and at the same time, allowing others to do things for me, to provide for me. What I needed was to have absolute faith that the universe provides for me always in many forms: through one person, or another; a situation; an opportunity; or an occurrence such as a surprise invite for dinner. And that this is a good thing.
So jealousy actually served as a nudge from my soul to let me know that I needed to shift my mindset to continue in the flow and in-spirit. So the next time you feel jealousy jabbing at your side, ask yourself “What’s up with that feeling?” and let it be a door to discovery.
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Thank you and Namaste, Karen